FIRST TRIAL

[neverhadafriend]

[Once the investigation begins to wrap up, there's a loud feedback noise as a blue speaker appears from thin air. In a tinny, warbled voice not unlike an announcer in a strip mall:]

Will, uh, the people who've been kidnapped against their will and brought to this terrible place please report to the lobby?

[As you approach the lobby, Genie can be found floating overhead, looking...well, nervous. Once everyone has gathered, he waves his hand, and the floor begins to rumble and shake. Slowly, the compass pattern on the ground begins to come apart, reforming and arranging themselves into a spiral staircase descending down into the ground. It's difficult to tell where it leads just by peering down--it looks like you're going to have to walk down there, yourselves.]

See you all downstairs.

[Genie disappears in a puff of smoke. As you descend the staircase, you'll notice the air growing colder and colder, the club disappearing far above you. Eventually, you reach a pair of metal double doors, each of which has a porthole to allow you to look into the room--although it's difficult to make out many details.

As you push open the doors, a blast of warm air greets you as the bright lights overhead practically blind you. After your eyes adjust, you'll notice that the entire perimeter of the room has been decorated in bamboo or thatch, as if someone had transported a beach-side attraction to an underground bunker. The room itself is circular, with a series of podiums set up in a ring. In the center of the podiums is what looks to be a stage. It looks like the numbers on the podiums correspond to your room numbers.]

So! I'm sure the audience at home knows how this works, but for those who are, um, new to this whole system, I'll lay out the rules. You've gathered the evidence, which means it's time to go over it all and figure out who killed poor Doctor D.

BOY, I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE WHICH ONE OF THESE SUCKERS DESERVES TO BE EXECUTED!

[The new voice comes from above in the form of a metallic squawk, and if you look up, you'll notice that dozens upon dozens of swings and branches hang from the ceiling. Colorful, tropical birds perch above, staring expectantly down at the guests, but their movements seem stiff and inorganic. The bird that spoke up, an orange and yellow conure, leans forward on its perch and leers down at Genie.

Genie clears his throat, ignoring the bird.]

...Oh, yeah. And, um, if you don't vote for the correct culprit, my master said that he'd kill you all. So let's hope you sleuths are good at sniffing out murderers.

[He doesn't seem terribly enthused about it, and doesn't even whip out any funny pop culture references. To be fair, no one would, given the circumstances. The birds, however, begin jabbering among themselves, looking very excited about their newfound entertainment.]

[ TRIAL START! ]

Comments

[primafacie]

It was intended to grant wishes. Presumably, he meant for us to wish to escape and then it would blast the front doors.

[halloteen]

A cannon is a little violent for wish-granting. Nobody would have been murdered by a wish-granting pillow.

[primafacie]

Yes, well. That would be the mad scientist part of his work.

[halloteen]

Maybe it wasn't even supposed to end up like this. It could've been some awful accident. [maybe someone wrongly assumed doof was competent]

[primafacie]

I think we can quite safely say it wasn't supposed to end like this, but there was clear tampering and someone deliberately pushed the button so I think it's less safe to assume it was an accident. Besides the trail of shoeprints I found only went one way.

[Meaning they were in the room before the glitter happened.]

[dannydorito]

So maybe the Doc found a how-to in the library and did it wrong, there's a reason humans have so many stories of "forces man was not meant to know" or whatever.

[halloteen]

He didn't really seem like he had the [how to say this delicately] capacity for magic? Someone else had to be involved for that.

[dannydorito]

I keep telling you people there's less of a difference than you like to pretend there is. Aptitude helps, sure, but with the write directions any six-fingered loser with more brains than common sense can rip apart the dimensional barriers, you know?

mods!

[nobodylikesyouwhen]

Look, that still would mean he needed directions. Stop just... throwing random junk around, you're not helping.

[ She turns up toward Genie. ]

Can you tell us if there are any... magic instructions in the library that he could have found?

[neverhadafriend]

[Genie scratches his head, and a bookshelf appears out of thin air behind him. He puts on a pair of glasses and begins rifling through it.]

Magic, magic. M........Medusa, nope. Mythology? Nuh-uh.

[As he searches, he throws the books over his shoulders, until he eventually turns around and shakes his head.]

Nope! Nothing about magic that he could've learned from the library. But maybe he could've learned from someone else?

[nobodylikesyouwhen]

So either way, someone else had to be involved with the magic part. Which would make the "wish" part of the... "wishinator" make sense.

[ She turns towards Bill. ]

So what was that about "the right directions," again?

[dannydorito]

So he got some instructions from someone directly instead of getting 'em written down. So?

[nobodylikesyouwhen]

So we're still looking for someone with magic. And if they haven't come forward and said they helped him, they probably have something to hide.

[goldiloxy]

[A gasp] Do you think they gave him bad directions on purpose, so it would kill him instead?

[madmadam]

Ooh! Wouldn't that be devious!

[dannydorito]

And hilarious.

[dannydorito]

Right, cause even an innocent magic tutor would really want to admit to any part of this.

[nobodylikesyouwhen]

If they didn't do it, they didn't do it. Their life in on the line just like the rest of us. You're the one who fits that and is trying hardest to point fingers and waste our time.

[dannydorito]

I am ONE incredibly handsome flesh person who MIGHT fit. Frankly, I am beginning to doubt your objectivity here.

[nobodylikesyouwhen]

[ An eyebrow quirks. She picks up the note. ]

"My dear beloved human friends."

[dannydorito]

Right, the Doc was being really weirdly specific there, it's been pointed out how speciest that is.

[nobodylikesyouwhen]

I mean... unless the letter was forged by someone with a weird thing about humans.

[dannydorito]

Stabby, I am beginning to suspect there is something specific you're trying to get at here, and I hear you.

[Dot dot dot]

...I've been saying it was nerdbot all along, glad to see you're seeing the light here.

[nobodylikesyouwhen]

Rrgh-

[ She visibly... tries to calm herself a little, okay. ]

If you want me to just say it, I'll say it. You used magic to make his machine kill him, and you're so bad at pretending to be a person that you couldn't write a convincing fake letter.

[primafacie]

He called me a mortal the other day, which would have been flattering coming from anybody but him.