You aint never had a friend, never had a friend...

[pleasureislanders]

[So

At least the Genie seems pretty darn friendly for a Genie?

Unfortunately he doesn't seem to be able to send you guys home anytime soon. But on the bright side, minus some certain jerks (looking at you, Bill), no one seems blood thirsty enough to resort to murder, not when they could try to escape. And with a helpful (well... helpful as he can be) host, perhaps no one will die!

... Yeah I can't even pretend to joke.

As you wake up the morning following the host appearing himself, there will be a list of club rules next to all the profiles. Which should at least discourage Bill Cipher from murdering everyone the instant he stops being a puppet.

Still, the week seems pretty peaceful, and you can explore the hotel more if you like. or even chat with the Genie if you want to squeeze some information out of him/befriend him! He's not picky!

Enjoy your time while you can, adventurers...]

[MONDAY TUESDAY WEDNESDAY THURSDAY FRIDAY SATURDAY]

{OOC: Welcome to your first weekly log! Since this is a peace week, there will be no murder occurring this week! Feel free to mingle with each other and use the regain mask if you have long enough threads.

Have fun everyone <3}

Comments

[doofenshmirtz]

[Doof has been searching all over the Adventurers Club to find any sort of board game. He does eventually find a few worn board games in the closet of the lounge room, but the boards are all worn and mouse-eaten. The checker set, in particular, looks particularly worn down, and it's missing almost all of its pieces.

After scrubbing the board clean and taking a quick trip to the kitchen area, you can find Dr. Doofenshmirtz sitting at one of the tables in the salon, a checkerboard set up on the surface in front of him. Except, instead of black and red checker pieces, it looks as if he's replaced them with slices of cheese and crackers.]

You! Come revel in the masterful strategy game that is checkers!

[bottlerockets]

Uh... sure?

[Checkers is typically a pretty friendly game... even if the pieces he's using are unconventional.]

Which one should I be?

[doofenshmirtz]

I dunno. Do you want to eat cheese or crackers when you capture pieces? Personally, I'm more of a fan of crackers, but--waaaait, if you're a chicken, can you eat cheese? Like, that's a dairy product, right?

[He scratches his chin, frowning?]

Birds are lactose intolerant, right?

[bottlerockets]

[... According to google they are, which I did not realize myself. Huh.]

I, uh... don't eat a lot of it, no, but... i-it's okay, you can just eat my pieces too if you want?

[He's not going to fight for the position of crackers here if that's what the other guy prefers playing as here.]

[doofenshmirtz]

[Doof pushes the checkerboard, selecting the crackers for himself. He makes the first move, of course.]

So! You're Chicken Little. I'm surprised OWCA apparently put some money into allowing their agents to talk in plain English. Who's your nemesis supposed to be?

[...Is he. Assuming that Chicken Little is part of OWCA? Why, yes. Yes he is.]

[bottlerockets]

OWCA? Nemesis?

[Chicken Little doesn't know how to answer that, but after thinking for a moment on what nemesis means... like bullies? He makes his own move as he answers.]

I... don't really have a nemesis, I think? Save for maybe some people who used to bully or beat me up at school sometimes, like Goosey, and... Foxy. But Foxy seems to have changed, so now we're not enemies anymore?

[diebartdie]

Checkers.

[He’s reading a book in the corner, narrowed eyes looking up at Doofenshmirtz behind the pages.]

You mean Poor Man’s Chess.

[doofenshmirtz]

It's checkers. There's nothing similar to chess at all! I mean, chess has all these complicated rules and weird pieces for no good reason beyond needing to confuse potential players!

[Who's this fuzzy-haired clown?]

Listen, buddy, do you want to enjoy a game or not?

[diebartdie]

Complic- chess is a masterpiece of game design! The perfect strategy game in every regard, and you wish to dismiss it for game in which the primary facet of it's design happens to be RED-AND-BLACK LEAPFROG!

[Sigh.]

I suppose it's either playing a game or trying to read this dreck.

[doofenshmirtz]

Well, excuse you! If you were paying any attention, it's now cheese-and-crackers leapfrog.

[He crosses his arms, looking irked.]

So--you wanna be cheese or crackers, or am I gonna have to throw you out of my otherwise pleasant game area?

[diebartdie]

...the very picture of sophistication, you are.

I shall be the cheese.

salon

[feudalladyshandmaid]

[...She almost passes him by completely, but hey, she hasn't played a good board game in... a day or so.]

Sure. Just as long as you're prepared to lo-

[...]

There are cheese and crackers on this board.

[doofenshmirtz]

You have a problem with cheese and crackers, Ms. "Too Good To Eat Snacks While You Play Games"?

[Look, he couldn't find all the pieces, so this will have to do for now.]

[feudalladyshandmaid]

If you want to play the game, why would you eat the pieces?

[doofenshmirtz]

Because the whole point of this is to eliminate the other person's pieces on the board, duh. Once they're eliminated, you can eat 'em!

[Makes total sense.]

What? Not a fan of the cheese and crackers? We could always swap it out for something different.

[dannydorito]

Aw gee, I dunno if I can really stand up to such a massive intellect, Doc.

[...He's just gonna grab a cracker off the board and eat it. Sorry, Doof.]

[doofenshmirtz]

Hey! I put a lot of effort into constructing this so that the cheese and crackers perfectly align in taste and mouthfeel--

[He stops, then lets out a laugh.]

Just kidding, here's another one.

[He pulls out a cracker from under the table and puts it on the board.]

[dannydorito]

Don't sell yourself short! I'm sure you aligned a great deal of that intellect of yours onto this project.

[But sure, he'll actually sit down and move a piece. It's probably even a legal maneuver.]

[doofenshmirtz]

[Hooray! Checkers!]

Really? You think so? Thanks! I just took whatever sliced cheese we had in the fridge, to be honest.

[He scratches his chin staring down at the board, then makes his next move.]

Say, you look familiar. Have I met you somewhere before?

[dannydorito]

Ah, that's the kind of shortcut that makes you a genius.

[He takes another move, pausing carefully before speaking again.]

Besides this whole kidnapping situation? It's possible, I suppose. I talk to a lot of geniuses, but I feel like you'd really stick out.

[acruelirony]

... Why are you playing games with food.

[doofenshmirtz]

Why aren't you playing games with food? In my opinion, intellectual activities can be much more improved if you have a caloric intake to supplement them.

[No, he's not going to explain the predicament that lead to this in the first place.]

Are you going to play checkers or not, you old hag?

[acruelirony]

Can't you eat snacks off to the side instead of turning them into game pieces?

[Yzma narrows her eyes at the "hag" comment.]

No one in this place knows how to treat people with respect, I see. Is that any way to talk to an empress?

[Still. She sits down across from him.]

I'll be the cheese.

[doofenshmirtz]

Empress? Really? Well, your highness, I don't know if you've noticed, but we're all stuck in here together, whether we like it or not. So, unless you're, like, empress of the Adventures Club, I don't think that means anything to me.

[Still. At least he's gotten someone to play with him.]

Oookay. That means I get to go first.

[He moves a piece forward.]

[acruelirony]

It matters if we both manage to survive this stupid club and I have you thrown in prison for your insolence. Or worse.

[Still, he's not... totally wrong, loathe as Yzma is to admit it. There's no guards in this place. She has no real authority, excluding when she manages to intimidate others into falling in line- like Kronk.

She's not a fan. She makes her first move, scowling all the while.]